Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
