Texts From Last Night

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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Is it any good?

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.

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  (615): Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet. (404): Is it any good? (615): Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that. http://tfl.nu/ptq9
  Replies (46) Good night (3726) Bad night (648)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".

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  (404): i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ". http://tfl.nu/tf5y
  Replies (388) Good night (41276) Bad night (4231)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now

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  (708): We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now http://tfl.nu/mm02
  Replies (21) Good night (7176) Bad night (1053)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.

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  (401): I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy. http://tfl.nu/4ar4
  Replies (38) Good night (5949) Bad night (1257)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this

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  (516): I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this http://tfl.nu/xbb7
  Replies (21) Good night (1089) Bad night (4378)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.

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  (712): Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk. http://tfl.nu/ntux
  Replies (11) Good night (3706) Bad night (872)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.

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  (719): I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts. http://tfl.nu/kevg
  Replies (2) Good night (1937) Bad night (794)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face

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  (802): i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face http://tfl.nu/in3q
  Replies (6) Good night (797) Bad night (1705)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  This is the weirdest negotiation ever.

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.

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  (678): This is the weirdest negotiation ever. (814): This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue. http://tfl.nu/rt97
  Replies (1) Good night (2050) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.

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  (801): Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight. http://tfl.nu/mlx0
  Replies (11) Good night (2058) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.

  (813): View more from Florida

  You always make things weird.

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  (863): Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower. (813): You always make things weird. http://tfl.nu/1vvg
  Replies (7) Good night (1154) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.

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  (310): So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned. http://tfl.nu/t3gi
  Replies (0) Good night (839) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.

  (817): View more from Texas

  Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".

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  (817): Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender. (817): Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii". http://tfl.nu/6w6n
  Replies (2) Good night (546) Bad night (303)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  whose parrot is this?

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  (416): whose parrot is this? http://tfl.nu/79eu
  Replies (3) Good night (707) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card

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  (217): I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card http://tfl.nu/8646
  Replies (0) Good night (664) Bad night (350)

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