Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia http://tfl.nu/7fa5
  Replies (17) Good night (2095) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark http://tfl.nu/z2dx
  Replies (27) Good night (7032) Bad night (641)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate. http://tfl.nu/mwsu
  Replies (53) Good night (5916) Bad night (774)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless http://tfl.nu/7ms7
  Replies (22) Good night (978) Bad night (5337)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention? http://tfl.nu/dhyh
  Replies (22) Good night (1317) Bad night (5160)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life http://tfl.nu/dyz8
  Replies (8) Good night (2713) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99... http://tfl.nu/p4eu
  Replies (32) Good night (1725) Bad night (7049)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen. http://tfl.nu/nx95
  Replies (10) Good night (4048) Bad night (799)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero http://tfl.nu/dyje
  Replies (8) Good night (5357) Bad night (676)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants. http://tfl.nu/zsuu
  Replies (2) Good night (1159) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona. http://tfl.nu/nax7
  Replies (3) Good night (1714) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): 'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?" http://tfl.nu/d6iq
  Replies (6) Good night (1948) Bad night (631)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood. http://tfl.nu/t851
  Replies (3) Good night (1795) Bad night (504)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business. http://tfl.nu/gu5e
  Replies (10) Good night (677) Bad night (1200)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that?? http://tfl.nu/dflx
  Replies (9) Good night (255) Bad night (585)

Randomize