new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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