Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
