i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
