Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
