She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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