11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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