her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Green mimosas i think yes
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
