She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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