I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize