he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Dicks are not precious.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize
