Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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