That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize