By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize