I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
