I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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