your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Randomize
