are you still at the devil's house?
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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