No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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