Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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