ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
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