His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
It's never too late to be topless.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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