Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
