So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
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