Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Just invented taco cereal.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
