You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.