Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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