Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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