It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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