my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
i think i scared a bird with my dick
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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