You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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