My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
