he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
