Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
