Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize