i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize
