I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
and she was petting her beer can
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
