we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Randomize
