Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize