I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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