She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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