I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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