So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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