What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
