once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
