So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Randomize