Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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