Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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