My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Drake has all the answers
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize