Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
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She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
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It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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