Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
